Take a breather with some recent funny or just plain strange stuff that we've found:
top 'Santidote' sites
Let's face it: Santa Fe can take itself just a little too seriously. These Santa Fe antidote sites, or Santidotes as we like to call them, provide a refreshing perspective.
http://www.museumofbadart.org/ The Museum of Bad Art: A refreshingly healthy ,hilarious website dedicated to preserving actual "art too bad to be ignored". Especially recommended after slogging through Santa Fe 's Friday night gallery openings.
http://www.mjt.org/ The Museum of Jurassic Technology: a museum to truly end all others: the ultimate museum/science parody site. Subtle and obtuse, but very funny. prepare to lose yourself for the day.
New Mexico Barbie
Ed Campbell found this some time back, and we finally have a home for it: "Don' t know point of origin", Ed wrote us, "-- but, some of it is terrific".
Mattel recently announced the release of Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for the New Mexico Market:
Taos Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white
socks. She prefers that you call her "Willow". She does not want or need a Ken doll, but you if purchase two Taos Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
Santa Fe Barbie
This princess Barbie is only sold in Santa Fe. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired
foreign dog named wolf and an authentic adobe house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.
Northeast Heights Barbie
This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full
time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
Espanola Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy Low Rider with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash. Preferably small untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we
don't know what you are talking about. Hair spray and fake fingernail kit available.
Sandia Heights Barbie
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.
Clovis Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Coors light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk.
Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.
Canyon Road Barbie
This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print ski outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends on Canyon Road.
Percocet prescription available.
Valencia County Barbie
This tobacco chewing, brassy haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased
Beer-Gutted Ken out of Belen Barbie's trailer. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see
through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
Nob Hill Barbie
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy
were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.
Raton Barbie
She's perfect in every way. We don't know who Ken is cause he's always hunting.
Hobbs Barbie
This Spanish Speaking only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired temporary plates and three baby Barbies in the back seat, but
no car seats. The optional Ken doll comes with a Meat Packers uniform and is missing three fingers on his left hand. Green Cards are not
available for Barbie or Ken.
Trinidad Barbie/Ken
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple "snap-on" parts.
Rio Rancho Barbie
She is a Software Engineer with great social skills. Comes with a laptop and cell phone. Can juggle late night phone calls and supervising not quite adult children. Grandchildren at no additional cost. Optional Barbie neck brace available.
wind of change
With the recent hurricane activity, Bob Morris charted hurricane paths correlated with election patterns , with some interesting results. You can't say he didn't warn you...
JibJab
If you missed this one, you've been in a cave but we'll recap, just in case:
(AP) - In a summer that has seen politics turn nasty and profane -- from Whoopi Goldberg's scatological jokes at a fund-raiser about President Bush to Vice President Dick Cheney's vulgar outburst on the Senate floor -- an overheated nation has finally found relief courtesy of a 60-year-old Woody Guthrie tune updated for today.
The song is "This Land Is Your Land," a left-leaning vision of America that evokes the golden valleys of California and the food lines of the Depression. But the song has been rewritten to trade those earnest couplets from the Dust Bowl's poet laureate for schoolyard insults -- Botox-user! Dumbbell! -- sung in the voices of the sparring presidential candidates.
The parody was written by Evan and Gregg Spiridellis, brothers and business partners who run a small animation studio out of a warehouse in Santa Monica, Calif. They posted their three-minute video of the song on their Web site, http:/www.jibjab.com, and it quickly resonated with Americans of all political persuasion.
Only after production work began on the film did the brothers learn that Kerry had been playing Guthrie's song at fund-raisers. Gregg Spiridellis said, "Seeing him strumming with Bon Jovi, raising millions of dollars singing `This Land Is Your Land,' that's kind of funny."
The brothers Spiridellis make their money doing animation for ads for major corporate clients including Sony, Revlon and Disney. Then, in their free time, they make political cartoons because they like to and they think it will help promote their company. Their last short film, "Ahnuld for Governor," was shown at the Sundance Film Festival. (Schwarzenegger makes a cameo in the film, as does Bill Clinton, in a hilarious bit with a swimsuit model.)
But nothing they've done has hit a nerve like "This Land." It was posted on their site July 9 and had 5 million visitors in its first week. They stopped counting after that because their server couldn't handle the load. They've since switched to a larger server, and many millions more have seen it, many repeatedly.
"We do these things as a labor of love," Evan Spiridellis, 30, said in a phone interview this week. . He thinks the appeal stems from the even-handed approach of the film -- Bush and Kerry get equal time and are equally ridiculed.
"It pretty much cuts down the middle and there's something in there for everyone to laugh at," he said. "As silly as the political discourse has gotten, this is still the best process in the world. There are big issues at stake."
The brothers won't say who they support in the election, and it's impossible to tell from their cartoon -- probably a good thing given their big-name clients. They're working on an animated movie for Disney called "Grumpy Santa," based on their children's book of the same name, though work has certainly slowed with the crush of responses to "This Land."
It's not at all what they expected.
"We're just two guys in a warehouse in Santa Monica," Gregg said.
He thinks part of the film's success is the levity it provides in a campaign that is certain to get nastier as November approaches. As one fan posted on their site, "With months to go in the campaign, I needed something like this to put it all into perspective."
Submitted as a comment in July by reader Jay Raymond , here are things you have to believe to be a Republican today:
1. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney and Halliburton did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
2.) Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
3.) The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
4.) A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
5.) Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
6.) The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.
7.) If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
8.) A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
9.) Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.
10.) HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.
11.) Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
12.) A president lying about an extramarital affair is a impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
13.) Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.
14.) The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record, A.N.G flying status cancelling "physical" and "timely" Harkin Energy trade is none of our business.
15.) Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.
16.) You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.
17.) What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '70s and '80s is irrelevant.
18.) You think that the Republican Party really cares about what you want.
Its really very simple:
Classic information, but a handy reminder when trying to sort out who stands for what in this election season:
An American Republican: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?
An American Democrat: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty forbeing successful. You vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. The people you voted for then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.
A Communist: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
A Fascist: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.
Democracy, American Style: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.
Capitalism, American Style: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
Bureaucracy, American Style: You have two cows. The government takes them both,shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the drain.
Feudalism: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
Pure Socialism: You have two cows. The State takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. You have to take care of the cows. The State gives you as much milk as you need.
Bureaucratic Socialism: You have two cows. The State takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of all the chickens the State took from the chicken farmers. The State gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you should need.
Pure Fascism: You have two cows. The State takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.
Corporate Fascism: You have two cows. The State takes both; their cronies form a corporation, hire you to take care of the cows and sell you the milk.
Dictatorship: You have two cows. The State takes both, drafts you.
Pure Communism: You have two cows. Your neighbor helps you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
Russian Communism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the State takes all the milk.
Cambodian Communism: You have two cows. The State takes both and shoots you.
Pure Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbor decides who gets the milk.
Representative Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbor picks someone to tell you who gets the milk.
Bureaucracy: You have two cows. At first, the State regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both cows, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.
Pure Anarchy: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.
Libertarian-anarcho-capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Some strangers try to take the bull and kill you — maybe they are stopped by a private protection agency, maybe they are not.
Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The State requires you to take harmonica lessons.
some weird or interesting sites:
http://www.traipse.com/thing_in_a_jar/ It is exactly what it says it is. The most intersting visual art project anyone's thought of in a long time. Drew Oldrich's home page - http://www.traipse.com/whats_up/index.html - leads to more creations and concepts by one of the best avant-geek-art conceptualists out there.
http://www.humandescent.com/ From the clever to the funny to the downright truly disturbing, this interspecies Photoshop work is not to be missed.
http://j-walkblog.com/blog/docs/platform.htm the j-walk GIF by Matt Gale. May make your skin itch or crawl.
http://www.killerfonts.com/main.html Killer Fonts: on a completeley different wavelength, but interesting: you can purchase fonts based on the handwriting of famous and infamous historic figures: Jesse James, Lizzie Borden, Genghis Khan, John Dillinger and others are available to help you put that final spin on your document or graphic.
http://www.koerperwelten.de/en/pages/home.asp Body Worlds: art or science? Gunther von Hagen and his plastination techniques for preserving and - permanently displaying - the human body has created shock and controversy at most installations. On a similar but much milder note, from the U.S. National Library of Medicine comes the Visible Human Project® http://www.nlm.nih.gov/research/visible/visible_gallery.html ;the latest in3 D cryology imaging. The "head to toe" video is a must-see.
post your jokes!
Use the comment form to give us your best humor, original or that youve heard somewhere. Based on all our reader participation in the comments , there's a lot of wit to share, so make your fellow readers laugh!
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